Once it’s out there, it’s out of your control. “This starts with looking at privacy settings in social media accounts and being aware of how location-based services work,” Adams says.ĭon’t fall into the trap of believing that an app permanently deletes images and messages. It may not be possible to completely eliminate sexting as a form of flirting among teens, but as a parent you can educate your teenager about safe sexting. Just as you listen to their perspective, it’s necessary to communicate the potential harm that could result from sexting, which include:ĭigital and real life are only becoming more enmeshed.

Not shaming your teen does not mean completely supporting their actions. Your teen may be using different methods to explore their sexuality, and many people go through this phase into sexual maturity by interacting with the world around them. Instead, you might consider normalizing their curiosity. They might even rebel and do the exact opposite just to spite you.” Pham adds that, in his opinion, “what your teen does in their private time is their own business, and you won’t be able to check on them all of the time. “Although there are times when this is needed, convincing them about the dangers of sexting isn’t one of them.” “One mistake is ordering their teens to do what they want in a specific way,” he says. When Erik Pham, parent and managing editor of Health Canal, discovered inappropriate messages in his teen daughter’s TikTok account, he was careful to open a dialogue instead of shaming her. Your teen may simply shut you out and seek sexual exploration elsewhere. Going straight to punishment and forbidding communication using a smartphone is probably not the best course of action. Then take a deep breath and start a thoughtful, two-way conversation following the tips below. In the interim you might gather more perspective on parental boundaries with teens and what to make of privacy as they age. If at all possible, wait until this shock wears off before you say one word about it to your child. Your immediate reaction to seeing sexually explicit content on your teen’s smartphone might elicit strong, panicked feelings. Whether you were actually snooping or not is beside the point. Or maybe you were innocently scrolling through your teen’s phone looking for the family picture that they forgot to message you, and you stumbled upon a nude photo. Maybe you happened to be holding your teen’s phone when an erotic text message popped up. This is where you, the parent, come in to help your teen safely navigate technology and sexuality. The familiarity paired with the false sense of security while using these apps might encourage teens to send a photo or message they otherwise wouldn’t. “With the development of software like Snapchat, many teens feel a sense of invisibility about their actions online,” says Kristen Adams, a licensed clinical social worker and the founder of GTX Teen Therapy. Most teenagers don’t know life without the internet, apps, and smartphones, and that ultra familiarity can cause them to act recklessly without fully comprehending the risks of sexting - particularly with apps that claim to “erase” messages after they’ve been viewed by the recipient. drive to experiment and seek attention from peersįalse security from apps that delete messages.natural drive to separate themselves from parents.

not fully developed limbic system, which manages impulsiveness.

not fully developed prefrontal cortex, which navigates decision making and internalizing long-term consequences.

increased physical isolation due to the COVID-19 pandemic.

If you’re from a pre-smartphone era, you may be wondering why on earth your teen would send nudes and put themselves in such a vulnerable position.

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